happy lasagna and pie day

AKA thanksgiving, AKA the harvest festival in ACNL.

but, as we all know, thanksgiving is never about anything except commercialism, and an excuse to eat tons of food because everyone else around you is eating tons of food. we say it's to "give thanks" and to gather once a year to see the whole family, but we know it's not true. not even the story of the first thanksgiving is even true. you don't give thanks to anything or anyone except the opportunity to eat around three days worth of calories or more in a single evening. and come on, when mother said, "get dressed! it's time to go see the family for thanksgiving!" you went, "uuurrgh..." because you hate seeing great grandmamumsy, who speaks so softly, you just nod your head while she's talking, uncle whatshisname, who has been bailed out of prison recently by your wealthy grandfather, who makes sure EVERYONE knows that HE paid for YOUR food, so for the rest of the year, you have to treat him like he's a god for the entire year, cousin somebody, who you remember beating you up constantly when you were kids, and then that one family member who just think is the worst in every way. the only solace is in the turkey... which was NOT at that first feast, by the way.

the first "thanksgiving" was more of a harvest festival, ironically, and it lasted for three days. it's been documented that this may have happened in SEPTEMBER, not November. this was a time when the pilgrims found themselves with little food, so they reached out to the Indians to join in a feast to bring them together, making peace between the white man and the red man. we're taught in schools the nicest version of this story they can, garnishing the feast with foods a typical American eats on thanksgiving. it's funny how our textbooks contain so many lies when it comes to history, huh?

there were multiple "thanksgivings," and they were usually celebrated each time the pilgrims successfully slaughtered those red skinned monsters (their words, not mine), many being shipped to Europe for slavery, many being kept as slaves, and the rest? beaten to death, chased down and gutted alive, beheaded, treated like animals if any of them came out of their tents to fight. women and children still hiding in their tents were burned alive. this was a thanksgiving, and after all the massacre was over, they'd celebrate with feasts, usually consisting of different kinds of fowl (NOT turkeys, though), fish, deer, corn, and pumpkin. much later, the pig was the main part of the feast, which, in our time, has been replaced by the turkey. after feasting, they would play a nice game of kick-around-the-indians'-heads-for-fun.

since there were so many reasons to give thanks during the year (i.e, many slaughters of people who weren't white), our very first president declared this celebration to only be held once a year on the 26th of November. it wasn't until Lincoln, our sixteenth president, proclaimed that thanksgiving take place on the last Thursday of November, did it stick as a yearly, nationwide holiday, though, in the years to come, some individuals tried to change it for... reasons, which I assume are not important enough to be mentioned. Roosevelt is the one who made a LAW that the holiday was set for the date Lincoln proclaimed. (Canada celebrates it on the second Monday of October. hey, my Canadian friends, what's YOUR country's reason for celebrating it, if it differs from America? I'm curious.)

how thanksgiving evolved into turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, and whatever else is tradition is beyond me. though, other countries have their own feasts similar to a thanksgiving. of course, they have their OWN reasons for celebrating.

in the present day, America's most myth-based holiday is about grocery stores jacking up their prices for these food items, but marking them as if they're on sale (which is a completely legal marketing technique), as well as other items, because for some reason, we have to have thanksgiving themed merchandise, too. you know, for most americans, I'm sure celebrating this dark holiday is fun for them, whether or not they know its history. food! FOOD! FOOOOOOOOD!!!!!

for mike and I, we have out own tradition. we get up, he sticks a stouffer's family sized lasagna in the oven, we watch whatever show we're on, the lasagna is ready about an hour later, we eat a few pieces, and then he pulls the pumpkin pie he got at vons out of the fridge. we also drink sparkling bottles of sugar and flavored fizzy bubbles, which contain less drink than you may think because the bottles are so thick, it actually robs you of the ounces it says it is. and really, you're just paying for that bottle, not the bubbly liquid inside. we eat a piece of pie, and then he gets ready for work. now it's just another day. I'm alone at home, usually with cramps because of the wonderful visit from aunt flow, and I play video games, watch movies, and, if my cramps aren't that bad, work on the computer.

so to us, "thanksgiving" is not that at all. we don't pretend to give thanks or celebrate anything, it's our excuse to eat lasagna and pumpkin pie the one time out of the year. and then I eat the leftover lasagna for the next week. I dunno why, he doesn't like reheated pasta much. BUT I DO!!!!!! and then mike will work until midnight for black Friday. I love being alone (she said with sarcasm.)

so yeah. American holidays are just farces. I dunno 'bout any other country, because I haven't a clue about their holidays, but many of them probably revolve around commercialism and food, too. I think, if schools are going to teach us history, they should teach us the FACTS. who cares about how gruesome they are, I think we all need to hear them instead of sticking our fingers in our ears and singing, "LA LA LA" at the top of our lungs.

I did the harvest festival in ACNL, though, that was fun!